Why I'm No Longer Talking to White People About Race by Reni Eddo-Lodge

Who really wants to be alerted to a structural system that benefits them at the expense of others? So I can’t talk to white people about race anymore because of the consequential denials, awkward cartwheels and mental acrobatics that they display when this is brought to their attention. I’ve written before about this white denial being the ubiquitous politics of race that operates on its inherent invisibility. All the while he stared obliviously, completely confused by this pain, at best trivialising it, at worst ridiculing it. Watching The Color of Fear by Lee Mun Wah, I saw people of colour break down in tears as they struggled to convince a defiant white man that his words were enforcing and perpetuating a white racist standard on them. It’s not really surprising, because they’ve never known what it means to embrace a person of colour as a true equal, with thoughts and feeling that are as valid as their own. The words hit a barrier of denial and they don’t get any further. It’s like something happens to the words as they leave my mouth and reach their ears. Their throats open up as they try to interrupt, itching to talk over you but not really listen, because they need to let you know that you’ve got it wrong.Įven if they can hear you, they’re not really listening. Their mouths start twitching as they get defensive. Their eyes glaze over in boredom or widen in indignation. The journey towards understanding structural racism still requires people of colour to prioritise white feelings. They’ve never had to think about what it means, in power terms, to be white- so any time they’re vaguely reminded of this fact they interpret it as an affront. I just can’t engage with the bewilderment and the defensiveness as they try to grapple with the fact that not everyone experiences the world in the way that they do. They truly believe that the experiences of their life as a result of their skin colour can and should be universalised. At best, white people have been taught not to mention that people of colour are ‘different’ in case it offends us.

This emotional disconnect is the conclusion of living a life oblivious to the fact that their skin colour is norm and all others deviate from it. It’s like treacle is poured into their ears, blocking up their ear canals like they can no longer hear us. You can see their eyes shut down and harden. I can no longer engage with the gulf of an emotional disconnect that white people display when a person of colour articulates our experiences.

Not all white people, just the vast majority who refuse to accept the legitimacy of structural racism and its symptoms. I’m no longer engaging with white people on the topic of race.

Why I'm No Longer Talking to White People About Race by Reni Eddo-Lodge